i am still processing what happened. i supposed i will be processing it for a long time.

one of the great things about theatre, certainly one of the reasons i love it, is the immediacy of it. The performance one witnesses can only exist then and there in that moment in time with that group of people watching. Every show exists unto itself. That is probably one of the reasons i am so attracted to found space theatre, it becomes that much more immediate, especially if the show is tailored to and inspired by the place in which it occurs.

when Swallow-a-Bicycle does found space theatre we invade that space. We make it our own, live and breathe it. With the seafood market in the east village for our show i-Robot Theatre it was no different. In fact the first weekend in the space Mark and I slept over in the space to really get to know it and have it inspire and shape the material we were bringing in.

For the next three and half weeks 7 performers, a writer, a stage manager, assistant stage manager, a designer/technician and myself put blood, sweat and tears into making i-Robot Theatre. The show was 90 minutes, taking place over 12,000 square feet including 4 major areas plus smaller office spaces. The show includes traditional theatre, movement, talking appliances and one hell of a puppet. For the last week i barely slept driven by fear and the desire to make it achieve the potential we collectively conceived.

then preview. then preview. then preview. then preview. then preview.

we got a call about 7 hours before preview telling us the space was unusable because of the fire system thingy. they were more specific but that will have to do for this. the point is the building would not and will not be safe for a large public group to be in. it is heartbreaking news and the timing is the one thing that i will probably not fully understand.

What needs to be stated here is that there is no bad guy.. The only real fault was perhaps in rushing the whole process. however I cannot stress enough how this came about from the desire to make something very good and special occur. Both CADA and CMLC were dedicated to giving artists both a working and performance space. Their intentions were good and they worked incredibly hard to make it happen. Ultimately this will also be a loss for CMLC, CADA and many artists in Calgary.

However right now the loss is most painfully felt by the members of i-Robot Theatre.  The group sacrificed so much and worked their asses off to get the behemoth of a show ready. To lose the show is a lot like breaking up with someone you love: at first there is an immediate rush of freedom but very soon you realize you are losing something special and beautiful that you will never have again. I know that i-Robot Theatre will happen. I know it will be better, we will trim the fat, push the themes, and the condense ideas further. We will use the time to refocus and take stock of what we can do to make the show better. However it will never be that show again, the one in the seafood market. As i mentioned it is like losing someone you love, and for me the healing process in that takes awhile. it is a day to day.

to the cast, crew and creative ensemble of i-robot theatre, i love you all